Tried To Create A Budget

by Aiysha
(NY)

I tried to start a budget so I knew what I was buying and I didn't want people to force me to buy stuff for a wedding if I didn't need it. I think not planning a wedding is like throwing money out of the window. If you are not on a budget that's just way too much in one day.
I tried it the cheap way but those ideas failed and DIY is too much time.

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Hi Aiysha,
I can hear your frustration and I understand how you feel. But if you do not create a budget and stick by your budget, you are not in control. Start over. First, how much money do you have or will you have saved up when it is time to start buying things for your wedding?

Maybe your wedding date should be postponed so you have the time to save up and so that you have the time to make the things you want for your wedding. Or maybe you don't want a big wedding. That is fine. Either way, make a decision as to when you will have it and how much you have to spend. See if the groom and his family, along with your family would be willing to help financially or with the food or cake or dress or flowers. Find out who cooks great food and who is crafty. Have a meeting and explain that you are the bride so you are in charge but you would really appreciate their help if they will go along with you and your dreams while staying in budget.

Then sit down and make a list of the wedding things that are important to you. Divide up the money between categories. This is your wedding budget. Don't buy anything at this stage. You are just seeing how much you have and how much each category in your budget will get.

Remember, you are in charge of your money. Your money is not in charge of you. You tell it where to go. It does not boss you. That is all a budget is.

If you don't have much to spend, get married in your church using your fellowship hall and it should cost you little to nothing. Find a cheap dress at a consignment shop or a second hand store, unless someone will let you borrow one.

As far as do it yourself takes too much time, yes, it can, if you do not have help. You need a team to help you. Your friends and relatives should help you do stuff. If they will not help you, I understand. My family would not help me with anything and my best friend got angry when I got engaged so she would not help me. My other best friend was her sister so she would not help me either. I was on my own. I did what I could. We just had a cake and coffee reception. It was a very simple wedding, but here we are almost 23 years later, still married. We have 3 grown children. Our oldest got married in May of this year (2009) on a budget and their wedding was much fancier than ours was, very beautiful. They were on a budget and planned it all out over a year in advance. They dated for 4 years. Don't be in a hurry. Take your time and enjoy dating and planning. I wish you the best. Would love to hear how it all turns out. Let me know if I can help.
--Juanita